Triumph of the Liams

    Let me start out by saying that I enjoyed watching Mojo. If you have basic cable you may not get Mojo as it is an HD only channel. I'd never heard of Mojo before about a year ago when their shows started popping up on Hulu. If you are unfamiliar with Mojo just think of SpikeTV but in high definition and with even more dude-centric programming... So you might be asking yourself, does the world really need an HD version of Spike? As a dude I feel qualified to answer affirmatively. Mojo was a fun channel to watch and their programs actually seemed more worthwhile than most of the crap on Spike. I say Mojo was fun to watch because it's now dead. Just like so much DuMont Network, Mojo is now consigned to the annals of history.

    Alright, who sent a memo to all the soccer moms and hipsters telling them it's cool to wear plastic shoes in public? These things have been around for a few years now but recently I've noticed that everyone has a pair of Crocs. Supposedly this monochrome petroleum polymer footwear is just so awesome that no one realizes they look like a retard while wearing them. And I don't mean a retard in the popular you're-acting-like-a-fool sense, but rather I mean retard in the actual mentally-retarded sense. Whenever I see someone wearing Crocs in public I can't help but think they've escaped from someone's protective supervision and they're on the lam, only they don't realize that they won't get very far because they are wearing plastic shoes...

    You may not have heard of Cuil before. They've actually only just opened up shop today. So what is Cuil... well, it's like Google, but different. It's a search engine built by former Google engineers, it even has a weird name like Google's top secret projects. Supposedly it's pronounced 'cool' which is mildly ironic, because the site is anything but cool.

    Since when does everything have to come in a chipotle flavor? Who made this decision, and don't tell me it was the consumer... this isn't some all knowing market force correcting itself because of some overwhelming public demand. Marketing is more likely to be the culprit. Because of some fluke focus group thousands of miles away now I have to be bombarded by ads telling me how chipotle is the hippest shit to eat. Well I'll tell ya, it's not that good. Wow, it's kinda spicy, but it doesn't taste any different than jalapeño... maybe I'm missing something. Did you take a good look at the image on the right? It may look like a benign box of "cheese straws," if there is such a thing, but before you commence to snackin' you should take note that they're packing some extreme chipotle flavor. I'm sorry, that'd actually be bodacious chipotle flavor... <liam>

    This weekend I watched the first couple of episodes of ABC's I Survived a Japanese Game Show. Going into this I expected to see a rip off of Takeshi's Castle/Most Extreme Elimination Challenge but with fat and stupid Americans as the contestants, and that's pretty much what I got. The premise behind the show is that ABC duped some random reality show contestants into flying to Japan without any explanation. Supposedly the contestants only knew that they were going to be in a reality show, nothing more. "This is what happens when you put 10 strangers in a Japanese Game Show, what happens when you stop being polite and start getting real?" Well, Real World this ain't...

    So there I am, minding my own business, reading the news headlines until something tickles my fancy. "Oh, Nintendo shows off a new game and it's called Captain Rainbow?!?!" So naturally I click on the link so I can scoff at the article on 1up. I read a few lines of the story, it didn't seem like anything interesting, blah blah Birdo, blah blah Super Smash Bros. And then, out of the corner of my eye I think I see a smiling baby on the right side of the page, but as I glance up to mouse over the red X to close the window I realize that's no smiling baby... ZOMG IT'S A BABY WITH A CLEFT LIP!!! Damn you, Cleft Palette baby, you've fooled me once again. Fooled me into looking at your grotesque deformity...

    Myspace recently changed things up a little. The "new design" isn't really all that new, there are a grand total of two changes. The new navigation is better than the old nav but it's still nothing to write home about. What is notable though is this story which points out how these changes will 'free up' space on the site for more ads. And who doesn't like more ads, I hardly ever notice the ads on myspace, especially the one where you can win a $50 Macy's gift card if you shave Brittney Spears' head before the timer runs out.